Right now I am...
:: giggling because I always manage to plan a very busy workday when all the other family members are "sort of taking the day off". Oh well.
:: still getting some work done
:: wondering how much I'll share here about my new writing gig. I have one. That's probably all you need to know (it's in Dutch)
Right now I am...
:: laughing at myself because of today's picture. This morning I wondered if maybe I'd challenge myself next month and try to take pictures inside for a while. But I thought "nah, not yet, I'm to busy to start new things and I like to go outside to find me something beautiful".
But today is so dark, cold and rainy that none of the things I tried outside came out right. So here I am, taking pictures inside. Maybe this will be a way to reconnect to my home a bit.
Right now I am...
:: looking at my handwriting (notes for my new book are next to me, but words aren't flowing yet)
:: wondering why I always slip from 'nice' to 'almost unreadable' (hmn, maybe because I do and have always done most of my writing on the computer)
:: smelling the wonderful scent of draadjesvlees cooking (actually I think it's the spices I smell, but it is delicious anyway)
:: glad that I finally remembered that I wanted to make this (I usually remember an hour before dinertime, that's way too late for draadjesvlees)
Right now I am...
:: content that I stood up for myself (that major disappointment? it's not anymore)
:: excited for new plans that are starting to work out
:: tired because I was a model for my girl again, two days straight in a row and one more tomorrow
:: happy that then she's almost through catching up the three months she missed because she had an injury on her right hand
:: trying to make myself shut down the computer and leave it down for the weekend
Right now I am...
:: listening to a cat declaring that he want his dinner this minute
:: telling him that he's two hours early (and he started this an hour ago!)
:: thinking that he maybe confused because today is a dark, dark day
:: trying no to remember that he could also be hungry because two hours ago he emptied his stomach on the couch, the table and the floor..
:: feeling the darkness of this day inside my head
:: trying to find some sunshine in doing the things I love (taking pictures in the rain... something like that)
Right now I am...
:: thinking that indeed my word for 2012 should be 'confidence'
:: knowing that's what I lack the most these days
:: working on it, really
:: kicking myself to get back to work, finish that novel* and start those new projects (I'm battling doubt crows)
:: reminding myself of the song that this blog was named after. I choose that name a few years ago because that was how I felt. I will feel like that again.
*Edited to add: finished! Printed to let my proofreaders (the girls) have a final check and then off to my publisher it goes!
Right now I am...
:: tired because I did a lot of (house) work today
:: frustrated because that didn't leave me any time to write (I have a novel to finish and some new work to prepare)
:: worried that I will always have to choose between the two
:: thinking that it might be a good idea to go back to a routine with complete days cut out for writing or housework
:: smiling because I know routines just don't work in this house
:: working on fully accepting that
Right now I am
:: so happy that we have a bit of sunshine to enjoy today
:: feeling my energy returning
:: happy that I finally got around to some much needed cleaning
:: wishing you all a wonderful weekend!
Right now I am...
:: smiling because this morning I first was a Japanese Blossom Fairy and then I broke my nose (not really)
:: thinking I need to explain now that I was a model for my girl who is training to be an allround make-up artist (in that beautiful "Amsterdamse school" building)
:: so proud of what she has accomplished so far (working here and doing internships here and here)
